No one truly wins in a divorce and more often than not, children are the ones that suffer the most. It’s been proven that divorce has adverse psychological effects on children depending on their age and their relationship. The most significant impact on a child is how you manage your relationships after the divorce. Some parents may feel spiteful towards their ex-spouse. These feelings become extremely apparent to children very quickly and could potentially form psychological problems further down the line. On the other hand, there are a few things you and your ex-spouse can do for the betterment of your child.
How to Help Your Child Cope with Divorce
Children and Divorce: Involvement
When asked what children want from their parents after a divorce, the most common answers are generally more involvement. You can see how a parent’s involvement may begin to slip after a divorce, especially if you have to share custody or one parent acquires sole custody. You need to form a plan with your ex-spouse to stay involved with your child’s life and build your relationship as normally as possible.
Children and Divorce: Keep it Civil
Being civil with your ex-spouse is another key element of helping a child cope with your recent separation. They can start to feel the tension build in a hostile atmosphere. The best thing to do is try to build a workable friendship with your spouse. Remember, your child isn’t used to this, so speaking ill of your wife or husband in front of them only serves to damage your child’s psyche.
Children and Divorce: Expression
Give your child an outlet to express their feelings. If you have the time to talk with your child about what’s going on and ask them how they feel. Allowing your child to express their feelings will help them cope with divorce. They can let you know what aspects of their new life they don’t like and you can do everything in your power to fix it.
Children and Divorce: Routine
You may not always be around your child, but you can make them feel secure by planning a set routine with your ex-spouse. You child may feel insecure about the future. Having a routine that is consistent and strong will give them back their feeling of security.