Whether you’re being hostile and malicious towards your spouse or treating them with complete respect, children always seem to suffer on an emotional level. However, it’s in the best interest of the child for parents to observe kind and respectful tone between parents to help them overcome any feelings of anger and frustration they may feel towards the situation. Below are just a few of the things that are probably going through a child’s mind during a divorce and that you should be mindful of when interacting with your spouse in front of them.
Advice for Divorcing Parents
Children often feel neglected when parents are going through the divorce proceedings and even for a while after as you adjust to your new life. The best approach is to stay involved in their lives as much as you can even simple things like going to the movies or the park can mean the world to them.
Seeing two people that used to love each other fighting is very upsetting, regardless of age. This could really hard on a child’s psyche. You need to work with your ex-spouse to develop a system of conversation, even if you have unresolved feelings, to show that you and your former partner still respect one another.
A simple piece of advice for divorcing parents is to never use your child to send messages back and forth to your other partner. This is very damaging because it shows your feelings of petty aggression and spite in a way that even a child can understand. Again, this is why it’s important to develop a healthy relationship with your ex.
Remember that in a joint custody relationship, your child will have to live with the consequences of either parent leaving their spouse in financial ruin. Working out a fair split of assets is in the benefit of your child as well as you own bank account.
The most important pieces of advice for divorcing parents is to never speak negatively of your spouse in front of your child. It makes them feel like you want them to choose a side and this can cause severe psychological damage down the road. Always speak of your former spouse respectfully, especially when they are away and you’re with your child.